Monday, January 30, 2012

I Should, I will, or God Wills?

Stained glass at St John the Baptist's Anglica...
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I have been thinking upon “I should” and “I will.”
“I should”
“I should” is either self-hatred or a way to not feel so bad for saying I won’t. In Self-Hatred should becomes a never ending list of things to condemn yourself. “I should lose weight,” “I should exercise,” “I should spend more time with family.” These are some of my should’s (you can identify your own I am sure). They subtly eat away at the general well-being of the soul. Taking all of our shortcomings, failings, and disappointments in life we can turn them into should.

It is self-hatred because should just eats away and eats away and eats away until the will to do anyting is gone. You become resigned to this death sentence on the soul. This self-condemnation does not change you or what you do. “I should” never leads to any change just greater and longer lists of discouragement.